Philadelphia, I love you.

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around."

Over the past few days, I've been thinking a lot about where my life is right now: a recent college graduate who is just trying to navigate her way through the eccentricities of life (which is essentially what this blog is all about). I'll readily admit that a lot of change has occurred in my life over the past few weeks in that I've left the comfort of the life I've known for four years in order to experience a year of seemingly crazy transition and will need to adapt quickly. Moreover, the "real-world" is calling and I really do not know where that is going to lead me, especially in these crazy economic times. When reflecting on the last few weeks and the changes that have been made, I remember the opening quote from Love Acutally, one of my favorite movies (seriously...how can you NOT love Colin Firth rushing into a restuarant in Portugal on Christmas Eve to find Aurelia???), which is posted above. In the movie the words signify a great deal about our personal relationships. I would not be what I am today without the love from those who have been with me and supported me the longest. I am truly grateful and appreciative of everything they have ever done for me. However, in another context, those words also exhibit our responsibilities to society, specifically the younger generations out there as it is up to us to show them the love they need to succeed in life.

I was reminded of the ideas I just mentioned above on May 12, graduation day, at approximately 10:30 in the morning when I was sitting at Temple University's main graduation ceremony. The student speaker, who was simply phenomenal, spoke to the importance of greatness and inspiring future generations of greatness by remembering who we are and where we come from before we can make our mark elsewhere. As he said, "We need to ensure that youth today do not become a product of their community, but that their community becomes a product of them."

That got me thinking: "What have I done to ensure that youth today have positive impacts on their community?" Well, I guess that there is the whole teaching thing as well as ESF Dream Camp and PGST. Educating those students to BE THE BEST THEY CAN BE everyday is probably one of the challenging, yet enriching endeavors I could have partaken in my life. I am so happy I did because not only have I made an IMPACT on them, but they have made an IMPACT on me. I've taken a piece of something from every student I have met and they will forever be in my heart. I can see their vigor for life and vitality and love for learning and know that if they stay on the right path, their communities will be improved dramatically based on the great things they have done. Also, through working through Jumpstart, I've learned the importance of reaching students early and look forward to seeing the progress the kids I worked with there have made very soon. Furthermore, I have learned to LOVE through working with all of these students as they love freely, truly, unequivically, and unconditionally, which yet again makes me understand the truth in the Prime Minister's Love Actually statement. 

I've been lucky in that I feel that I had "made it" in North Philadelphia. And as I move on to Valencia, Spain, I will hope to make a mark there. Yet, I will never forget good ol'

North Broad Street

,

Cecil B. Moore Avenue

, the Boulevard, and so many other incredible facets of life that truly and completely make Philadelphia the city of Brotherly Love. I will culminate by providing a quote from none other than Russell Conwell, the founder of the premier institution from which I had the honor of graduating yesterday: "Let every man and woman here, if you never hear me again, remember this, that if you wish to be great at all, you must begin where you are and with what you are. He who would be great anywhere, must first be great in his own Philadelphia."

Temple, Philadelphia, friends and family connected by the bloodline of Phillies red and Eagles green, THANK YOU for the impact you have made on me and the opportunity for me to make an impact on you. Thank you for becoming (if only ever so slightly) a product of what I have left here and allowing me the chance to help others have the same impact. I will LOVE you forever, always remember, and one day, will return.

This is the LAST song.

"Ohmygawwwdddd today is like...your last day as an undergraduate student everrr. How are you going to spend your last day of being a kid?"

If I had a dime for every time someone asked me that question today, I'd have at least $6.00, which gets me a delicious veggie crepe with long hot peppers and feta as well as a Snapple from the Crepe Truck with seventy-five cents to spare. And being asked that question, as well as listening to a multitude of other statements today, got me thinking and helped me reach a resolution: I wish the word "last" was banned from the English language around the time of large transitionary life milestones such as...oh, I don't know...an impending commencement from a certain university (..cough..T for Temple U bright and early tomorrow morning...cough..)

The thought of the word "last" is just so grim. It makes me think of either the end of something special (like PGST or Temple) or sticking out something horrible until you are at a point where you can be relieved (like working at Panera). The events of life shouldn't be dreaded, but embraced, and thinking about this being the "last" time something will happen is ridiculous and sort of sickening to me. I don't know what is going to happen tomorrow (no, really, I don't...we have no instructions for graduation), let alone within the next few months or year and I'd hate to think of my moving to Valencia as being the "last" time I am going to ever see my best friends and loved ones. Instead, I prefer to think of it as an "until we meet again and we WILL meet again" sort of phase because that doesn't denote anything is ending.

So, all of you mopers, dry your tears, stick your chins up, and put on those smiles I love so much. Remember that you are all my SUNSHINE and I don't plan on May 11, 2011 being the last day I see sunshine in my life. This will not be the last time we hang out, or the last time we get dinner, or the last time we post about the various eccentricities of life on our silly blogs. I mean, we'll probably just do this next week. (On a related note, this will also not be the last time we don that silly academic regalia since I totally plan on looking the part of Gryffindor for HP7-2 in July.)

In all reality, this is a time of careful and uncertain transition for many of us, and yes, it is technically our last night of undergraduate university. But that doesn't mean it has to be the last time with the people we love nor that we need to reflect on the "last" of everything versus plan for the future. And should it unfortunately be the last time we see each other, listen to this beautiful song to remember everything and smile about the memories:  

I love you guys. This definitely will not be the last time I say that.

For Good.

“I’ve heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason

bringing something we must learn.

And are lead to those who help us most to grow if we let them,

and we help them in return.

Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true.

But, I know I’m who I am today because I knew you.”

MAY 12. It’s coming and it’s coming quick. And as we lead up to that day on which we will reach the Holy Grail of Higher Education otherwise known as GRADUATION, I think it is safe to say, for all intensive purposes, that this is the day of all days that many of us have been equally anticipating and dreading.

That being said, I know we have “oh so much to look forward to in the future,” but right now, the thought of getting married, settling down, having the kids, the cocker spaniel/beagle mix, the house with the white picket fence in suburbia, and the mini-van with the built-in DVD player just really does not appeal to me. I’d rather be in my cramped three-bedroom city apartment with Gina, Rachel, and Bridget, riding SEPTA from Temple to Berks and Front and then walking down Howard to school everyday where I will be greeted enthusiastically by children that are not my own, visit my dogs at home, and spend leisurely evenings on the roof of 2152 N. Broad with Kyle, Sarah, Ellis, Jason, Jeff, and many, many others while glancing at the gorgeous view of Center City.

In other words, I’m really going to miss the college good life, especially at TEMPLE, where you fall asleep to the sounds of the subway and sirens every night. I must say, I truly agree with those wise sages in the ever-classic Avenue Q who sing about their desire to go back to college. Kate Monster, Princeton, Rod, Nicky, Brian, Christmas Eve, Trekkie Monster, and Gary Coleman really had it right when they mention how simple college life is, remember the good ol’ days of dorms (shout out to 1940) and meal plans (not so much of a shout out to J and H…it was merely adequate), the life advice and overall helpfulness of advisors, and the yearning to have done more in their time there. Clearly, I relate so well to the lives of these talking puppets!

Yet, then I snap back from my reminiscing and remember the closing lyrics in the song:

“But, if I were to go back to college, think what a loser I’d be.

  I’d walk through the quad and think, ‘Oh my God?!?!

 These kids are so much younger than me.’ ”

Alas, such is life and I really don’t want to be that kid who is 42 and taking Spanish Basic 1 with a bunch of kids who weren’t even alive on September 11, 2001 and don’t understand the significance of Lady Gaga. Guess it’s time to thrive in my responsibilities and live my life the way it was supposed to be lived.

But…what is that exactly???

The truthful answer is that I don’t really know. I know it involves education in some capacity whether it’s bilingual special education, school psychology, or assessment and evaluation, and, at least for one year, involves Valencia, Spain, but I’m not quite sure what comes after that. I’m constantly in conflict with myself over what I want and how my life is going to work out and I’ve finally (with an inevitable laugh from my mother) have come to the mindset that it’s okay to not know all the details or have every last minute of your life planned when you’re 21. I don’t know if I’ll have kids, a dog, a guinea pig, or a chinchilla. I don’t know if I’ll be in Spain, Philadelphia, New York (the big dream), Montana, Alaska, or Guam. But I do know that if I end up choosing to be a soccer mom I will not drive a mini-van since I kind of want to be a MILF. And I know that I will be in a city somewhere educating kids who need me and value me.

If there is one constant that I do want in my life always, it’s YOU, which brings me back to the point of this blog. “You” know who “you” are and “you” are more than one person. You may be a badass ninja who runs around quoting “A Very Potter Musical.” You may be a soon to be student at Wesley. You may have just been accepted into Temple’s DPT program, or teaching music at Catholic schools, or doing Teach for America in Camden, New Jersey, or going to grad school at Pitt or La Salle. You may be looking for a job. You may be returning to Temple for your sophomore, junior, or senior years. You may be going to Villanova in the fall and the person that I LOVE and MISS the most from both of my tenures at PGST. You may be getting married in September or October. You may be movie back to Poughkeepsie. You and I may have a strange obsession with John Gallagher, Jr. You may be in Nigeria right now trying to figure out a date to meet up with me in London. You may be discerning becoming a Sister of Life. You may, like me, be a soon to be Fulbright ETA, but unlike me, be going to New Delhi, India (Congratulations again, by the way!). You may be one of my best friends. You may someone I don’t know that well. You may be a member of my family both immediate and extensive. You and I may have spent hours just talking in your Oxford Village apartment, many good nights at the Fox and Hound, gotten into debates over our belief systems and values, or met in line for the Allentown School District at a random job fair. You and I may have driven to Target or Wal-Mart at 2:30 am to pick up random items for 64 crazy govies, made snide comments during Model UN conferences, or spent two years together working for Jumpstart. You may be someone who believes that “Bread is your soul, passion, and expertise,” or you may be my best friend from high school who I miss like crazy. You may still be here or you may be one of the three influential people that have passed on so far this year (I love you, Poppop, Sister Helen, and Sheri.) No matter the situation I value you and appreciate you and THANK YOU. You have all been in my life for a reason and I know that I was challenged, supported, encouraged, and motivated by all of you. I am who I am today because of you. In the immortal words of Elphaba and Glinda in Wicked:

“It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime,

so let me say before we part, so much of me is made of what I’ve learned from you.

You’ll be with me like a handprint on my heart.

And now whatever way our stories end, I know you have re-written mine by being my friend.

Like a ship blown from its mooring by the wind off the sea.

Like a seed dropped by a skybird in a distant wood.

Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?

But, because I knew you, I have been changed FOR GOOD.”

I wish I could have put pictures of everyone up, but that would have gotten obnoxious. It doesn't mean I love you any less, it means I ran out of space. :-)

Tropical Eyes and How Time Flies

It has been quite awhile since the last post on this blog since I decided to lay low for awhile. But now I'M BAAACCCCKKKK and better than ever since I may have a bit (if only a bit) of direction in my life nowadays. I'm officially moving to Valencia, Spain in the fall to teach English in elementary classrooms as a Fulbright Scholar. I still have not grasped that concept and still think it is quite unfathomable that I got the Fulbright, but I guess it won't really feel that real until I get there. I am constantly having dreams that it is not true and that something is going to fall through, which will put me behind on the job hunt here. Yet, it is real and perhaps I need to just be hit with that realization...hopefully soon.

Over the past few weeks, my days have been spent either 1) student teaching (which ended on Friday, April 29) and 2) getting my Fulbright information together and mailed to the appropriate places. Luckily, I have had the good fortune of working with some people who have bent over backwards with kindness to help me get everything in order. I can speak volumes of how wonderful the Fulbright Advisor at Temple, the doctors and nurses that completed my medical forms and fought for appointment times for me, and the people at the FBI Fingerprint Services and Post Office have been to me. I do hope this applying for a visa process becomes a bit easier as time moves forward.

On a completely unrelated note, student teaching ended on April 29 (yes...the same day as THE ROYAL WEDDING...and, yes...I did allow the students to watch almost an hour of the highlights on www.cnn.com), and I don't think I was really prepared for it. I LOVE my kids but still did not realize how much it would hurt to leave them and my cooperating teacher. They all get me some very generous and nice gifts as well as write me letters which included, but were not limited to, the following hilarious phrases, completely penned by these third graders:

• "You are now free to live your life and be free."
• "I suggest when you go to Spain that you should take me."
• "I like how you look when I look at your tropical eyes."
• "Your eyes are yellow, blue, green, and hazel. They are tropical eyes and they are beautiful!"
• "I like how you dress like a lawyer."
• "You are my queen and I am your princess."
• "You are tall and short at the same time."
• "On the first day, the teacher showed you the attendance list. You called our names and said we said present when we were here or yes or no if we ate breakfast."
• "I like to stand next to you because I am very persistent."
• "Your new class needs to respect you like a teacher, not like a woman who is walking in the street."

Yes, I apparently have tropical eyes and am tall and short at the same time. There is clearly no better physical description of me.

It's crazy how fast this past semester went and literally does feel like I was just walking into that school for the first time yesterday. Seriously Time, where did you go? I graduate next week??? It's all just unfathomable to me. I'm going to miss those kids so much because they were awesome and I could not have asked for a better experiences than the one I received in their classroom. But, I guess it's time for a new adventure and I guess that new adventure is supposed to start now.

Oh...and as for that ROYAL WEDDING ...Gina and I just loved every minute of it and are currently plotting our entrances into the royal family as we speak. (...cough..Prince Harry..cough..) Also, thank you katemiddletonforthewin for keeping my days full of royal laughs. Keep it classy Britain, I hope to see you soon.